Clean Laffs

Good morning crew,

Is it really Friday? I have been running around like a
chicken with its head cut off all week and now that the
weekend is here it is just going to get busier.

The black belt test is tomorrow and I promised a friend
I would go with her to a wedding reception on Saturday
night. And while I am rarely one to turn down free booze
and a meal I probably should have skipped this one.

And then on Sunday old Mason and I have to take the boat
out of the water and drag it back to the south side for
winter storage. There is a 12-hour day.

After this weekend I am going to need a vacation!

Laugh it up,

Joe 

                            ***

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The feel of an iPod but it’s HALF THE PRICE…

Retail Price: $79.99
DEAL PRICE: $49.99

This Digital MP3/MP4 player, made by Coby, is more than just a
music machine. Store photos, playback some movies, record your
voice… even listen to the FM radio! Power via a battery
charger OR computer.

This is a a quality product designed to deliver outstanding
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PRODUCT FEATURES:
- 1.66″ TFT LCD full-color display (160 x 128)
- Plays music, video, photos, and text
- Plays digital music from most online stores & sub services
- Integrated FM radio
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- Touchpad Control Panel with LED backlight
- Stores up to 33 hours of music (roughly 500 songs)

Accessories included are earphones, USB cable and more. This is
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                            ***

“The other night in Milwaukee, a brawl broke out among
people leaving a Celine Dion concert. Apparently, the
people leaving early were in the way of the people trying
to leave really early.” -Conan O’Brien

                            ***

“There’s an asteroid heading toward the earth and we’re all
going to die. There is! Scientists are saying there’s a 1
in 45,000 chance of an asteroid hitting the earth in 2036.
Now an asteroid is a giant rock. It’s headed toward the
earth. We should send up a giant piece of paper. We couldn’t
send scissors; that would be impractical.” -Craig Ferguson

                            ***

“Here’s some good news – a woman in Milwaukee gave birth to
a 13 pound 12 ounce baby girl last week. Thirteen pound 12
ounces. Doctors say the baby will be walking before the
mother.” –Jay Leno

——————————————————————————————
THROW THAT OLD BULKY AND SCRATCHED CHOPPING BOARD AWAY…
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——————————————————————————————

When we finished a personality assessment at work, I asked
my friend Dan if he would share the results with his wife.

“That would require me to go home and say, ‘Hi, honey. I
just paid someone $400 to tell me what’s wrong with me,’”
he said. “And based on that, considering we’ve been married
23 years, she’d hand me a bill for about $798,000.”

*————– Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes —————*

On my way to a picnic, I stopped at a fast-food place to
order a quart of potato salad. “We don’t sell it by the
quart,” the clerk snapped. “Okay, then give me two pints,
please,” I replied.

I’m proud to say I held my tongue when she asked, “Do you
want it in one container?”

************************************************
END OF CLEAN LAFFS 
Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved.