Clean Laffs

Posts Tagged ‘Vernal Equinox’

It is going to be a very nice day.

March 20th, 2009

Good morning crew,

Here it is, folks, the vernal equinox and the first official
day of spring. And it is going to be a very nice day, too.
Mostly sunny and nearly fifty degrees with a little spring
breeze to keep everything fresh. As I recall, on the first
day of spring last year it was freezing. It must be global
warming.

Okay, everybody enjoy their weekend, stay safe, do something
spring-like and I’ll talk to you on Monday!

Laugh it up,

Joe

***

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***

“Kim Jong Il has demanded that North Korea open its first
pizzeria. I would go to ‘Papa Jong’s.’” –Jimmy Fallon

***

“There’s a big push to make Saint Patrick’s Day an official
holiday. I think they should make the day after a holiday.
‘Saint My-Head-Hurts Day,’ or something.” -Jimmy Kimmel

***

“AIG, which has already received $170 billion in taxpayer
money, paid $165 million dollars in bonuses. They say the
bonuses were justified because the company made an extra
$170 billion dollars last year.” -Jay Leno

———————————————————————————————-
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———————————————————————————————-

The phone rang. It was a salesman from a mortgage refinance
company. “Do you have a second mortgage on your home?”

“No,” I replied.

“Would you like to consolidate all your debts?”

“I really don’t have any,” I said.

“How about freeing up cash for home improvements?” he tried.

“I don’t need any. I just recently had some done and paid
cash,” I parried.

There was a brief silence, and then he asked, “Are you
looking for a husband?”

*——————– Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ———————*

On a recent trip to Washington, D.C., my brother-in-law
overheard a patriotic father pointing out a well-known
building to his son. “You see that triangular-shaped
octagon over there? That’s the Pentagon.”