Clean Laffs

Good morning crew,

I hope everyone enjoyed their weekend. I certainly enjoyed
mine….maybe a little too much. But it was the last big
weekend of the summer. You can’t really think about taking
it easy in a situation like that.

Life is a celebration, right?

I’ll fill you in on the details tomorrow.

Laugh it up,

Joe 

                            ***

SET OF TWO 5″ FLAMELESS ON/OFF PILLAR CANDLES

Normal Price: $19.99 each
DEAL PRICE: $14.99 for a Set of Two Candles

It looks like a regular candle, it flickers like a regular
candle, but it is so much easier and safer!

No heat, no melted wax to clean up. This is perfect for use
outside because the “flame” won’t blow out, and perfect for
inside events because there is no danger or mess. Use it
alone or in your favorite holder or sconce. The light
flickers exactly like a wick flame. 5″ tall, 3″ diameter.
A neat idea for your kid’s or teen’s room where you might
not want an open flame. Take it with you on your travels to
make hotel rooms feel like home.

This battery operated LED flickering pillar candle can be
used anywhere you would use a regular pillar candle, and
many places you wouldn’t. To see a picture or order visit:
http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/505/l/v06ie8
<a href=”http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/505/l/v06ie8“>
SET OF TWO 5″ FLAMELESS ON/OFF PILLAR CANDLES</a>

                            ***

“I’ve never been married, but I tell people I’m divorced so
they won’t think something’s wrong with me.” –Elayne Boosler

                            ***

My father was a dentist and my mother was a manicurist…
for most of their married life they fought tooth and nail.

                            ***

Customer: I’d like to try on that dress in the window.
Saleslady: I’m sorry, madam, you’ll have to use the fitting
room like everyone else.

————————————————————
IT’S BIG & IT GLOWS…
The Universal Jumbo Remote Control

Retail Price: $19.99
DEAL PRICE: $4.99

The size virtually guarantees you won’t lose it! With this
unique and user-friendly Universal Remote Control you will
never have problems reading the buttons again.

Replace all your remotes with one convenient unit. You can
control up to eight separate devices for your convenience,
while its large size prevents you from misplacing and losing
the remote again. Control your TV, VCR, DVD, SATELLITE, CABLE,
Or a mix of all.

The new glow keys make it amazingly clear to use in the dark!
Best of all it’s compatible with almost all major brands of
TVs and A/V Devices.

Plus the Journey’s Edge brand name ensures quality and
durability. Makes a thoughtful gift. Check it out at:
http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/505/l/ul4xd0
<a href=”http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/505/l/ul4xd0“>
Universal Remote Control</a>
————————————————————

The receptionist for the company where I’m employed found
some cash in the office, apparently mislaid by a co-worker.
She sent the following e-mail: “If anybody can say where
they lost $66, please let me know and it will be returned
to you.”

Within minutes one employee replied, “Arlington Race Track,
May, 2006.”

*————– Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes —————*

Heading down the interstate, our car passed through a huge
swarm of gnats so dense that their bodies made popping noises
as they hit the windshield. “I can’t get over how loud they
are,” my wife said.

“Well, we are hitting them at 65 miles an hour,” I pointed
out.

Her reply left me speechless. “There’s no way bugs can fly
that fast!”

************************************************************
END OF CLEAN LAFFS 
Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved.