Clean Laffs

Posts Tagged ‘Gym’

An idle butt is the Devil’s workshop.

April 30th, 2009

Good morning crew,

I have got to make it to the gym tonight. I haven’t done any-
thing more physically demanding than sit on a barstool since
Monday night and I’m starting to feel really guilty. It’s
time to pay for all that sloth! Plus, my black belt test is
coming up in two months. I need to start cramming!

By the way, still no word from the guy interested in the boat.
I may be forced to sink it in Lake Michigan and collect the
insurance.

Laugh it up,

Joe

***

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DEAL PRICE: $17.99
Get two (mix and match any sizes) for $29.98

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clothes. This body shaper will instantly make you appear a
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***

“Wal-Mart plans to open 90 stores in China, one of will be
a superstore called the Great Wal-Mart of China.” –Jay Leno

***

“It’s hot out! It’s so hot out that I stopped at Ben and
Jerry’s for a scoop of ice cream and the guy at the counter
asked if I wanted that in a cup, cone, or in my pants.”
–Dave Letterman

***

“My grandmother, who’s in her nineties, still drives. People
hear that and say, “God bless her.” But no one will get in
the car with her. She has a 1962 Dodge Dart, it has a push-
button transmission. At this point it’s like a slot machine.
She’s hit so many motorcycles, there are stencils of motor-
cycles painted on the side of the car.” –Garry Shandling

———————————————————————————————–
Purse Hanger 2-pk with Bonus Pouch
Cute, Clever & Convenient…

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DEAL PRICE: $5.99
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It’s always a problem… Where to put your purse when you’re
eating out at a restaurant. Hang your purse on the back of
your chair (easy for someone to slip off). On the floor – under
your feet (not very convenient or sanitary). In your lap? That
would get old quick.

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hang your Purse Hanger on the edge of the table and hang your
purse on the hook. This holds your purse within “YOUR” easy reach,
not the person sitting at the table behind you!

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where you conveniently and confidently place the strap of your purse.

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———————————————————————————————–

A young mother was standing outside a mall holding her six-
month-old baby and her sister’s three-month-old baby.

Two women approached the mother. “Are they twins?” one asked.

“No, they’re three months apart.”

“My! You sure had them close together.”

*———————- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ———————–*

We were helping customers when the store optometrist walked
by and flirted with a co-worker. Of course, we all had to
stop what we were doing to tease her. But she quickly dis-
missed the notion of a budding romance.

“Can you imagine making out with an optometrist?” she asked.
“It would always be, ‘Better like this…or like this?’”