Clean Laffs

Archive for August, 2008

Breakfast, lunch and din-din.

August 28th, 2008

Good morning crew,

It’s starve a fever and feed a cold, right? I hope so,
because I have been eating about four meals a day for the
last three days.

If I’m not going to be healthy for Saturday at least I’ll
be well-fed.

Laugh it up,

Joe

***

Cult Classic 20 Movie Pack on 4 DVDs…

Retail Price: $29.99
DEAL PRICE: $14.99

If you’re looking for truly unique and hilarious entertainment
you simply MUST check out this one-of-a-kind collection of classic
movies… with a cautionary message to us all.

These films were made in the 30’s, 40’s and 50’s and are unintention-
ally hilarious. They were made to help the youth avoid the whoa of
drug abuse, moral decay and so much more.

We’ve all heard about “Reefer Madness” which is included in this
collection, but there are additional films that are just plain
bizarre. You will see the heartache of moral decay in “Escort Girl”,
“Sex Madness” and “Slaves in Bondage”. And you will encounter the
truly bizarre in “Chained for Life” and “The Terror in Tiny Town”.

It’s hours of Cult Classic Viewing! Each of the four (4) DVDs are
Digitally Remastered for unmatched quality. Check out a video clip
from one of the movies and also get a list of films available at:
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<a href=”http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/505/l/pn0us7“>
Cult Classic 20 Movie Pack on 4 DVDs…</a>

***

“How about that Michael Phelps? Eight Olympic gold medals.
To me, that’s not the most impressive thing. The guy is
actually swimming home from China.” -David Letterman

***

“Sen. Hillary Clinton addressed the convention. It was a
highly anticipated speech. People were curious as to how
strongly she would endorse her former foe. She said what-
ever your feelings about the primaries, now is the time
for the Democrats to put aside their differences and
rally behind Mr. Potato Ears.” -Jimmy Kimmel

***

“The Republican Convention starts next week. John McCain’s
campaign told President Bush that despite his low popularity,
he will be allowed to speak at the first night of the con-
vention. They told Bush the convention starts in December.”
-Conan O’Brien

————————————————————
WW II Buffs – Here It Is!

If you’re a Navy fan or a history buff, take a look at this
offer. Now, The Victory At Sea DVD set has been digitally
remastered and has been repriced for — only $14.99.

This special collector’s edition is hailed as the greatest
historical film series ever made. The entire history of
WW II naval campaigns come into your living room.
26 episodes for only $14.99? What a deal and get your
collector’s edition while supplies last.
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Victory At Sea DVD Collection</a>
————————————————————

Bill had always been a prankster. As each of his friends
were married, Bill made sure some type of practical joke
was played upon them. Now ready to be married himself, he
was dreading the payback he knew was coming.

Surprisingly, the ceremony went off without a hitch. No
one stood up during the pause to offer a reason ‘why this
couple should not be married’. His reception wasn’t dis-
rupted by streakers or smoke-bombs, and the car the couple
was to take on their honeymoon was in perfect working order.

When the couple arrived at their hotel and entered the room,
Bill even checked for cornflakes in the bed (a gag he had
always loved). Nothing, it seemed, was amiss. Satisfied that
he had come away unscathed, the couple fell into bed.

Upon waking, the couple was ravenous so Bill called down
to room service and asked, “I’d like to order breakfast for
two.”

At that moment, a soft voice from under the bed said, “Make
that five.”

*————– Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes —————*

Marketing VP: Why haven’t you kept me up-to-date on this
account?

Ops Guy: I’ve cc’d you on every e-mail I sent to them!

Marketing VP: I don’t have time to read my e-mails. There’s
too much information in them. If you send me an important
e-mail, give me a call to let me know I need to check it.